How do you rate your week?

Posted: June 21, 2013 in Uncategorized

How do you rate your week?.

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This week, my week was talked about in both kingdoms. Recording breaking is good. Talley marks count. Sometimes I feel like I carry the weight of the world and even though I may think that, it’s just a fictional puffed up way to say, “I could use some help”. This week the world I live in never heard me say that, because the words never crossed my lips. But the kingdom I’m living towards, they heard my screams and every cry was met with retaliation from the enemy. Give up was my enemy’s battle cry. Doubt your cause was their air raid. The constant mumble was don’t take our word, just look at the giant waves all around you. You’re not even sure He can hear you from here…are you? Who could hear your baby cries when you’re choking on the storm your drowning in. Where’s your trumpet? The mumbles continued, people worth saving can herald their causes. You must not even have a cause, and if you think you do, you’re so far down on the list you don’t even have a rescue whistle. I heard all that in my spirit. Those untruths crossed my mind. Although they may have dragged me down, it was momentary and the truth that I’ve set my course on was the directional wind at my back.
The truth I know is I’ve been called to right an injustice, an injustice that matters. I’m called because I was born carrying the destiny to rewrite this history. Generations I will never meet, need me to hold on for dear lives. Great swimmers are never giving rescue whistles. Lifeguards save, they never herald for help. What I know is my Savior has made a way, because the cause I’m battling for is imperative. The truth is I’m more than baby cries drowning in my storm. I’m a formable opponent who has caused the enemy great stress this week. I met his financial rip tides with a distracted love for the people around me. And this is something I struggle with adequate words for, financial stress is distracting. As a single mother of three it’s possible to be completely overwhelmed by it. While there were times yes, I was distracted. But the things I was overwhelmed by were the brake marks on the road. Overwhelming love the big gigantic love that makes no sense. Mostly the Love that God has generously filled me with that sometimes came with specific direction, but there’s so much of it that it overflows into crazy things that normal love won’t touch. And when I press into it, and by press in, I mean put my thoughts towards it. Kinda like how a frustration get’s fed so it festers. Pressing is is a religious term that I think means you consciously put your thoughts to. You go after it with your mind. The goldmine I uncovered this week (and thats funny my biggest attacks were financial, because the revelation I uncovered was great nuggets of truth) and as I pressed in to Love. First the Love that my Father has given me and that revelation is another gigantic story. When I think about the ways he’s loved me, I get distracted by my brag stories on Him, they bring an automatic smile, because how could they not. It is a love story, just like in life when someone loves you and although your second hand reheated story may not cause the butterflies to your listeners, to you it does every time. Your heart stirs, your smile rises. That’s what my loves stories about my Father, my Savior, my Lord, thats the domino effect they start. Because His love it never stops there, well it never stops. Reminding my self of His great love springs a leak and then it bleeds onto the people I know that he’s specifically called me to love. As I follow through a well springs up and over flows my frustrations and where they usually rise up, they can’t swim, they drown. And it’s love that makes no earthly sense. Uncultivated love bubbles up. These aren’t champagne bubbles, oh no, these are, you put washing machine soap in the dishwasher bubbles. Overwhelming, will it ever stop love. What I noticed was that as I focused on it in the spiritual it followed up in reality. Believe it or not, all I can say is try it. Love conquers all. The greatest tactics the enemy came against me with, in the grand scheme of things weren’t even momentary setbacks. Great strives were made in the kingdom. Songs were written in celebration of the standards that were raised. It was a big deal. In the middle of it, it was a big deal. But on the other side it’s a different kinda big deal. Sometime’s the greatest thing we can do, in earthly terms looks like busy work. Reminding yourself of what He has done, is the greatest weapon against the enemy’s doubt casting. I believe that’s where engagement is made. If you resign your self to the doubt, the battle is over before it started. I firmly believe this is the first step to warring and changing history, If you don’t who will. No one else was created for your destiny.

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The day I link it all back to, was Thanksgiving 2010, I was praying with my sister and I’ve heard people talk about the presence of God and at that moment there was no longer any question in my mind had I felt it. It changed everything, I looked for it every time I prayed, and like a selfish child that wasn’t enough. I began to look for the presence while I was waiting on my kids at cheerleading practice or at a basketball game. Where’s he at? Was at the root of every question I ask. Seek and you will find I thought. I didn’t want to miss a single chance. That’s how I fed my hunger with more hunger, total distraction. What’s the score of the game? I don’t know, have you seen God, have you felt the Spirit? Of course I never said it out loud, but it was the tip of my tongue, that fumbled all my legitimate answers. Why wasn’t anyone else consumed? It began to leak out of all my conversations…”I felt God say…I think the Spirit wants” I said it with such enthusiasm that people listened, I think my passion was so real they could borrow it, but only while I was there. It was weird, or maybe I was…but I’m not. What I am is loved, truly, madly, deeply loved by the creator of the universe and he calls me his daughter, he calls me his beloved. He speaks to me. He encourages me. He lifts me up. I would say He satisfies my soul, but He doesn’t, I’m just thirsty for more. Looking for Him, desperately seeking Him, everywhere you go, in everything you do, just because you gotta know more, that’s where it started for me, that’s where my ears began to perk up. It really is a friendship that takes time to develop, you learn His ways and you get to know His heart. You wanna be able to run through a drive thru and order for Him. A friend you talk to everyday. A family member that the whole reunions a bust if they don’t show up. Your missing part. That’s where He fills you in.

overflow

If your not overflowing in peace ask the Lord if you’re carrying something you shouldn’t be, because in his presence there is fullness of joy!
Psalm 16:11
You will make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasure at your right hand.
Merriam-Webster say Joy – the emotion evoked by well-being, success, or good fortune or by the prospect of possessing what one desires.
Now how is it that Webster explains a verse I had agreed to never understand.
Hebrews 12:2
Fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and prefecture of faith. For the joy se before him he endured the cross, scorning it’s shame, and set down at the right hand of the throne of God.
Jesus had the prospect of possessing what he desired, the keys to death and the grave.
Revlation 1:18
I am the Living One; I was dead and now look, I am alive for ever and ever! And I hold the keys of death and the grave.
Joy unspeakable is the goal! Fullness of joy will carry you through the valley. What are you carrying that’s keeping you from being carried?

Have we been here before?

Posted: May 16, 2013 in Uncategorized

As you go through the peaks and valleys of life, many things will grab the front seat of your attention. But as you’re staying the course, how often do you acess the specific track you’re on and ask yourself do I know that I know that I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. I’m sure most of us can trace a path back to where we once ask that question. How often should we double check with God? Do you only ask directions when you’re lost? Well yeah! 

Recently I’ve made some pretty big changes and when I push back against fear and doubt and lean into my Heavenly Father I feel such an overwhelming confidence of being in the exact place I’m supposed to be. 

It made me think of the GPS I use. I’ve recently moved. There are now new routes in my life, and my temptation after I’ve been a couple of times is to not use my GPS, but with three kids in the car, my possibilities for distraction increase. Even with familiar roads when I’m thinking quick, left or right? Which one? Several times I’ve guessed wrong. See I was on the right road, but then distractions and doubt led me to choose incorrectly. Two things I could have done. Keep the GPS on, or I could’ve just stopped & forgot about the kids in the backseat or the drivers behind me and focused on the truth I knew. The other thing I know about a GPS is once you realize you’re lost, almost all roads lead back, it may not be the most direct route, but your destition is possible.

What I’ve noticed with my big changes is how much I love knowing I’m right where God wants me to be. This confidence brings an awareness that I’m where I’m supposed to be because there’s a “supposed to be” so I’m looking for it. I’m not where I am just for my healing, but so I can bring healing to others, it’s simbiodic! I’m not sure that because I’m where I’m supposed to be now, means I wasn’t where I was supposed to be before. What I do know is like when I’m driving, why not double check. Double checking creates another communication link. It’s how you begin to build foundational layers that cement those “know that you know” feelings to your heart. My prayer for you is that you know that know you’re in the right spot, because your destiny is hanging out somewhere close to your right spot. I pray that your heart will constantly remind you that your path isn’t just the road to your destination it’s somebody elese’s too, how can you help?!

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Reminding myself

Posted: May 14, 2013 in faith, god, Uncategorized
Tags: , , ,

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If my heart is overwhelmed and I cannot hear your voice, I’ll hold on to what is true though I cannot see. If the storms in life they come and the road ahead gets steep. I will lift these hands in faith, I will believe. I’ll remind myself of all that you’ve done, and the life I have because of your son. – Love Came Down

In my world the Doppler radar for storms in my life was working overtime, the shot up target on my back tells the story. When the sucker punches come and my weak spots are exposed my frustration rises like a ninja to the top. What wall failed, how’d the foundation crack? The attempts I’ve built to protect myself weren’t fool proof. What do ya do? Today I reminded myself of what He’s done and the list for this month alone is so long, even a complaint with a clause like that, will weaken the strongest resolve. Philippians 4, Rejoice in the Lord always and again I say rejoice, Let you gentleness be known to all men, the Lord is at hand, be anxious for nothing, but with everything in prayer and supplication let your request be man known to God and the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your heart and minds through Christ Jesus.

Sometimes God calms the storm, sometimes he lets the storm rage and he calms you.

No matter the former or the latter, He’s still our peace that surpasses all understanding.

Rejoice in the Lord always and again I say rejoice. In Hebrew the word rejoice is actually the opposite of peace, to spin around like a top in a violent motion. How can you spin around violently, making your gentleness known to all men? Sometimes in our lives, when the storm starts raging, we’ve got to move bigger than the storm. if the enemy is bringing a category 4, we need to be bringing a category 5 movement of God. Because that’s the peace. Be anxious for nothing, why does anxiousness come in…because I forget to first rejoice. If you forget to rejoice, or to keep yourself in a posture of rejoicing, which is a extreme spin of proclamation of the love of God and his goodness. Then all of a sudden you’ll find you’ve aligned yourself to the movement that’s against you rather than aligning yourself with the movement that is for you. When the enemy is trying to bring a clockwise storm into your life, God wants you to make a counter clockwise move. Its called moving in the opposite spirit. If there’s a storm raging I’m called to bring peace. When there’s peace I’m called to bring the rejoicing storm of the love of God. If we’re anxious for everything and prayerful for nothing,  peace isn’t going to be the sum of that equation, a storm will. The key is rejoicing, the key is gentleness, the key is knowing God is at hand. Supplication is deep groaning’s that cannot be uttered. Charles Spurgeon said often prayers that can’t be uttered are often prayers that can’t go unanswered. Supplication is the place of supply. And then it’s undergirded by Thanksgiving, and thanksgiving opens gates. The enemy may be opening a gate of storms on your life, but through thanksgiving you shift the gates back on him and bring a storm into his life. The greatest posture you can ever have in a storm is to receive what God has, not perceive, or conceive, just receive. As many as received him, he gave them the power to be sons of God. Receiving causes sonship to take place, A son is someone who knows who their father is. So if you try to do anything else but receive, you’re not going to know who your father is, and you put yourself in a place where he’s no longer our supply and we’ve got to preform. Anxiousness is of the mind, but peace is of the heart. When we find ourselves in a storm, our minds become very active, we begin to fear, we begin to doubt, anxiousness sets in. Every storm is an opportunity for an upgrade in God. The moment you posture yourself to receive you begin to move from the mind to engaging your heart. Then the God of peace that surpasses your understanding (which we do with our minds), will guard your heart and your mind, which means he engages his thoughts Jerm. 29:11 and brings a force field of covering to our heart and mind. A true no brainer!!

What's supernatural?

What’s supernatural?

Supernatural – from the Greek word super nature, means something in a realm we cannot see or understand….Well how do you begin to understand something that is defined by opinions…For more than a couple of years this subject has truly fascinated me. I guess it started when a prophet came to our church, yes that was definitely when I really started to push against the proverbial wall of what was possible and what was fanatical. The prophet knew things that I knew he couldn’t know, so that drew the line, for me it all hinged on the prophet and the light he shed with his foretelling. The way I rationalized it was this, the things he prophesied about he couldn’t have known without some supernatural connection, it was no coincidence, so if there was a possible supernatural, then for me that meant God was real and alive today, not just for when we die to judge our ways, but he was connected somehow, in this moment right now. For me this was pretty huge. Once you cross that line then where does it stop? If God is alive and aware of the goings on in my life today, that means I believe He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. So the God that created the universe, that spoke the world into existence is concerned on a personal level in my life. This is a powerful thought by its self, so if God is so aware of me, he can use a regular guy, a prophet, to speak things to me that I’d never uttered to a living soul. Can I know things about him that he’s never uttered to a living soul? Now this is quickly closing in on stuff we never discussed in all my Sunday school days. Was this sacrilegious or is this cutting edge theology? Is there such a thing as cutting edge theology? I don’t know, suddenly Sunday school seems more like a day camp, then an actual school, because if you don’t learn this in school, how exactly do you learn about these things? Where do you get schooled on what seems to be opinions? Well this was my thought process, I wanted to stick to the truth and if possible avoid the fanatical, so I decided truth would be what was biblical, so where do you go to get biblical truths on supernatural things? Well I went to iTunes, it made sense to me and I searched for every podcast that had the word Revelation in the description, I figured that was the most supernatural of the books of the bible, so why not start there. As you can imagine I founds hundreds and hundreds of podcast, so I just started in alphabetical order and started downloading, what I didn’t know what this was the beginning of the best journey I’ve ever been on. At first I just listened to a couple of podcast a week, when I had time, some I barely started before I deleted them and some I listened to over and over. Of all the hours and hours and even weeks and weeks of teachings of the book of Revelation, by far the best laid plan was done by Mark Driscoll at Mars Hill Church. Mark is an excellent bible teacher, he has a gift of relaying the word of God in a very practical way. I learned so many things from these podcast, but more than anything I heard, it was what I learned about myself that was the most surprising, I was desperately curious about God, my Savior, and how the Holy Spirit fit in. What did each of these unique aspects of the Trinity specifically mean to me? I didn’t know! But I was on a quest. I wish I could tell you how many podcast I’ve listened to over the last couple of years, I’d really like to know. A year or so ago my husband tried to sync his phone to our iTunes account and the cloud tried to add over 1,600 podcast to his iphone, but the space was unavailable. To him this was a sign of ludicrous, I just chuckled to myself surprised that the preacher’s kid who once thought she’d heard it all was still listening. When I exhausted the book of Revelation, I began to wonder about the Holy Spirit, and the iTunes search began again. This led me along side more questions of the super natural, it piqued all my interests. What about how the Red Sea parted. How did Gideon prophesy to the dry bones and they became an army? How did Paul and Silas sing their way out of shackles and prison gates. How did leprosy get healed? How did the blind see, the deaf hear? Jesus told his disciples greater works will you do, in other words, because you’ll have access to the Holy Spirit, you can do all the things I’ve done and more. So where does this begin, well the only thing I’ve truly learned so far is the first step, and that’s Belief! I don’t want to limit God, I don’t know what he’s capable of, and I don’t know what I’m capable of as an extension of Him, but at this point I’d say the possibilities are limitless as the galaxies are endless. I’m still listening and I actually heard a podcast today that I really liked from Catch the Fire London, Called “The Kingdom is full of strange things”. Beyond the everyday extraordinary, I’ve only casually experienced the supernatural, I’ve seen prophets, I’ve even heard testimonies of healing’s. I’ve felt the presence of God, I’ve known his peace that passes all understanding, I’ve experienced his fullness, but I’m shy of an extraordinary mind blowing thrill ride experience. I think its possible, I think God is as real today as he ever was. I think my biggest regret in the after life will be wishing I would’ve pressed harder for the things that were right at the tips of my fingers. I won’t let the blanks I’ve drawn, be the end of my story. I’m open to all there is. I’m expecting the unrealistic, the hidden to be found and the history to be rewritten. If it’s possible, why not dream as big as it gets?<