Have you ever had the Holy Spirit whisper something to you really loud. As I diligently pursued getting to know this teacher of the Trinity, I’m amazed by his gentleness, so its just like him to get a ferocious point across with the force of a whisper. So brief background, I had a relationship that was 99% frustrating, and I’ve been bringing this to the Father but what I realized through this learning experience was I was really treating my problems like a side dish at a pot luck, I was just sharing them and bringing them back home with me. What sorta faith is this. I was talking to a friend & every time she tried to give me advice it hit a nerve and the pain was all right at the surface, like a fresh wound that hadn’t healed at all. And let me interject this, the past couple of years I have been on my own journey to find out who God is to me and with every single discovery I’m completely desperate for more. I’m convinced my Father has given me authority I can’t even begin to imagine, yet I must begin to imagine. I am convinced the Creator of the universe, my Father, has more power than all my fears combined. Stories I’ve read and podcast I hear convince me that seeing the dead raised, the blind see and the deaf hear is more than a possibility its a commandment it’s a job description for the mighty calling on the life of every believer who dares. So these are the ground rules to what I consider the core beliefs of my secure faith, with God absolutely anything is possible. I think I believe that, but theres this relationship, a thorn in the flesh for sure, and on this day I’m in the familiar spot of hopeless & ready to jump off a sinking ship. I mean at some point thats just prudent, right? But see I know the words the Father has spoken over my life and I know the people they include and this relationship is involved, so anyways, I replay this conversation in my head as I engage the Teacher Holy Spirit & I begin to notice I have zero faith when it comes to this relationship, and the Holy Spirit reminds me that I believe God can do anything. I realize after tossing this back and forth I kinda don’t want God to fix this, almost in a humble way…like Ohh Father I got this, there’s plenty of other things that need your attention, and besides this it’s too broken, I should’ve realized that a long time ago and saved us both the trouble. And thats when the whisper comes….”but what about the fact that I make all things new?” I still hold my ground, but this would require more new than new car sent new, and that’s when I put my finger on it, deep down there was this murmur that said “No way, impossible, it can’t be done” I believe the Red Sea was parted, I believe the impossible stories I’ve heard about healings and miracles, but it boils down to idenity. God stepped in because more was at steak, was that it, was that where my faith hinged on the worthiness of me and my need. What kind’ve faith is that? Did I think God’s mercy and grace was for the multitudes but fell short when there was only an audience of 1. See when I actually say it, my heart argues with my head. I really didn’t know there was such a big part of me that was holding back, I thought I believed God could do anything, but now I knew there was part of me that wasn’t all in. This was an awakening, because when I break it down it easy the spot the lies, the crack in the foundation of your thoughts. The truth is God doesn’t need a publicity stunt, and just like I love each one of my children individually more than they could ever possibly imagine, He’s got me beat with his love for me. So if God is only as big as my faith is, no wonder my realtionship feels so hopeless, I wasn’t factoring him in to the solution at all. And this simple truth, this ferious whisper was a ground breaking revelation, that brought me in over my head in love with my Savior who’s waiting on me to invite him in. Waiting on me to line up my heart and head with the truth of who he is and the magnitude of how he loves me, he wants me to come boldly to him, but the bodly means I’m not holding back a bold request means, I’m asking for 100% backing and I know without you it’s impossible, but you make all things new. You know sometimes I thnk the Father wants to know what we want, what is it you want? Now do you believe he has time for you? Because his word says he does. Do you believe this is a problem you can fix, are you still weeding out possible solutions, because I was. I thnk the Father wants you to leave your “do it yourself, for dummies” book at home and come to him with complete abandonment, like a child, just like a child would, beacuse thats how the Father gets involved with an audience of 1 that comes to him just like child…and that changes everything…

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